I pretty much knew from the beginning that parenting was going to be a challenge. We went from being a intimate couple who loved to spend time together to being a busy household breasting feeding around the clock and co-sleeping our oldest son. Who is now eleven and very close to twelve. I can hardly believe that all of this time has passed and here we are sixteen years later after meeting with 3 kids, a dogs and a boat load of debt and we are happy.
Not at all how I really pictured life. I figured that I'd have a little girl in there somewhere. Well, you never know, we jokingly say we'll try for another next year. We'll see. LOL! Loving and parenting three boys is a joy most days. They are busy, fun, imaginative, creative, funny, and just plain loving at times. The only bad thing about it is the fighting when it happens but we think that will go away as they learn from us and get older and mature more.
When you are depressed and unhappy, parenting sometimes takes a back burner even when you don't want it to. You have that unfeeling feeling, nothing matters. When I'm depressed I'm an emotional roller coaster, up and down. I went on meds that just made me feel nothing. I've brushed them aside too many times and not paid attention. Now I love on them almost every minute and show them how much I love them with time and attention.
The biggest changes this past year we've made is chores and responsibility. Everyday there are chores. Frankly, they make the most mess so they should be contributing. It's a work in progress, only the oldest right now does what he's told and completes his tasks. The others are still pushing boundaries.
One thing that I missed when I was depressed was reading with them. I just had no interest in books and that is not like me at all. I'm back at it though and we read together again.
I'm not the only reason I'm getting healthy. It was my kids that got me on track. My oldest put on a bit of weight this year and we talked to him about healthy eating but we realized that we weren't setting the example that we wanted for them. Instead of talking, we are showing. A healthy diet can also help them with behaviour, better sleeping patterns, fit and healthy and not tired all the time. Healthy eating is a work in progress because I'm having a hard time getting them away from the sugar. My oldest loves sugar and I'm trying to show him how to snack without just eating the carbs and he is resisting. But after work/daycare every day I've been showing them a new healthy snack this week.
Most of the boys enjoy yoga and exercise, they like the Wii exercise games too. Starting the couch to 5k program will help too I think. I know I feel better already for starting it and it's only 3 days a week.
Depression makes you lose focus of the big picture and that big picture for us was being a happy and healthy family who put our children first. So we are getting back to it and taking it one day at a time.