Thursday, June 14, 2007

Not lost wandering the world...

I'd like to be but I'm not. I've had a few people ask me why I haven't blogged in awhile. Well the simple answer is that I just haven't felt like it. I've been busy with my boys or reading. I go through phases where I read and lately I've just been devouring books when I have a spare moment. It's starting to ebb now so I may get on here more often. Things have pretty much been the same, fighting my domestic abilities and managing three boys.

SmartGuy is taking Art Camp right now and loving it. I think because he can be with other kids his age or older and doing one thing that he loves to do and that is art in any shape or form. It's only three days a week. He's also mastered his bike and has no training wheels, he's thoroughly thrilled with himself.

We've been busy tending the garden, going on picnics, playing and the park and swimming. It's really nice to hang out with other moms and their children, mom's I get along with and have things in common with. I'd really like to get out my bike, the tires need air and going riding with SmartGuy, I'm sure he'd love that and he really wants to swim with me. I'll need to find a time to do that with him and only him. But it's hard with the two little ones along. I'm sure I'll figure something out.

Weight: 283lb. My official weigh in day in Friday and I thought for some reason today was Friday so today will be the day. I was maintaining at 286 for months now and didn't see any movement but finally it's going down, I'm not sure why because my chocolate addiction is still there...................I'm trying to leave it but I'm also not drinking as much pop which is always a plus. I'm trying to go for Water Days, with only water or real juice to drink. It's harder than you think. I started smoking again the week Hubby was away and I have to kick that habit in the ass again, especially if I want to do the triathlon again and I really do but I have to get out walking. I'm not walking everyday but almost.

We were going to walk yesterday but there was a bear sighting only 10 minutes before near the trail. I was actually out walking down the road from our house, the stroller loaded up and SmartGuy on his bike when someone stopped to tell me. So I turned around and unloaded everyone and everything into the van. Oh well! I'll be scared to walk that way for awhile and will be just parking the van in town and walking that way. I still keep meaning to do some of my exercise DVD's but as you know it's harder with kids around. But I think once I start doing it, they'll want to be doing it with me. I was thinking about buying another mat and cutting it in half for them because they always crowd me on mine or fight over it.

Yes, the fighting seems to be getting worse and I really need to get a handle on it. It's driving me bonkers big time. I bought marbles today and I'm going to start doing marble jars for each of the boys for good behavior and then at the end of the week they get a treat or well rather when the jar is filled they'll get something special. I'm really hoping that something will work with Little M because he's just crazy and doesn't seem to respond to any discipline. Lately he's been into everything when I'm not looking. This past seven days I've cleaned up hot chocolate powder, baby powder, xanthum gum, milk, juice, laundry detergent, dish soap, shampoo and a box of cereal. Seriously, this it the child who will drive me insane. As soon as I'm busy in the shower or feeding Bugaboo he's into something. I got a new shelf for our laundry room and he's constantly into the tool box and stuff on the shelf.

They fight and they fight over everything, they is hitting, biting, pinching and shoving and they always end up screaming and shouting and hurt. So that is where my sanity is going these days.

Don't' get me started on Hubby's work schedule. While on shift he's working 12 hour days and then he's at his shop building. And as a good wife I understand why he's doing it, not because he wants to be gone from his family but because he's working for his family but we are missing each other terribly and hardly have any one on one or intimacy right now. It's hard on us when we can't connect let me do. But the intimacy is another issue, I haven't been the same since Bugaboo was born and quite honestly it hurts and I know something is wrong, my cycles are messed up too. I had two right away after births starting at about 12 weeks or so. Everything could be attributed to giving birth, the Cesarean and having my tubes tided but I also think something else might be up and so I'm going to talk to the doctor on Monday and I'm not looking forward to talking about something so personal but it's the same doctor I've been seen for year and I'm very comfortable with her.

It'll all work out in the end I know. Once the August hits and SmartGuy is back and school and Hubby is slowing down at work and finishing work we'll be fine in every way except financially we'll be hitting our lean months. Ebb and flow!

So are you sorry you asked for an update now!

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